Busy Times

There is something weird about being busy.  The time flies by.  You never know what day it is.  Things are a blur all the time.  It is nice when it makes your days go by faster at work, but sometimes you just want everything to slow down.  It's nice to relax a take a breather, especially when you are not used to being busy.  The older you get, the faster the days go by.

Mondays

I'm not sure why Mondays always suck.  The weekend is never long enough and then you come back to work on Monday and BAM!  Everything goes to crap.  It's like people save up all the problems for Mondays.  Every problem you have, gets worse and worse.  Nobody's happy to be at work.  Everybody is in a bad mood.  We need to get rid of Mondays all together.  Who needs the headache.

Dessert

Imagine stuffing your face with your favorite meal.  You have one or two more helpings than you should, you get done and you can barely breath.  Then you realize, there is a tantalizing dessert waiting for you.  Do you go ahead and try it or do you wait til later?  You know you won't be hungry for at least a few hours and by then you won't feel like eating.  What are you going to do?

Deja Vu

Isn't deja vu a creepy thing?  You get a strange feeling like you have been there before or you have seen something before, even though it hasn't happened yet.  There has to be some kind of explanation.  I don't know what the hell it is, but it strange.  Maybe our subconscious lives in another alternate universe.  Well, maybe not, but it is pretty weird.

End of Summer

When summer begins to fade and the air gets a nice crisp chill in the mornings, I get a little sad.  I am a summer guy.  I like to be outside playing golf, mowing the yard, playing with the kids.  Winter is so drab and confined.  Who likes cold windy days?  They suck.  I guess it's 6-7 more months before things will turn around. 

Book

Is there anything like getting engrossed in a good book that you can't put down?  You can picture all the characters, you can see the scenery, and the plot unfolds right in front of you.  You furiously flip through the pages, rushing to the ending.  And then when you get to the end and the resolution plays itself out, you can finally let a sigh of relief.  And then you can start another one.

Showers - Part III

One thing I've never understood is people that will take a shower before going to the gym.  Or taking a shower before playing golf.  What is the point?  So you will smell good for 10 minutes before get all sweaty and nasty?  I don't get it.  Just wait until you get done and shower then.  Don't waste the water, the time, or the towel.

Showers - Part II

It is amazing to me the ratio of male to female products in a shower.  It has to be 1:19.  I have one item in the shower, hair and body wash.  But women seem to think they need a different product for each part of their body.  Plus 4 different hair products; conditioner, shampoo, who knows what else.  I still haven't figured out what all of them are.  Women have to make everything so complicated.

Showers - Part I

Evening shower or morning shower?  I guess it depends on the situation.  If you get done mowing the yard, obviously it will be an evening shower.  Or if you know you are going to have to leave early the next day, again an evening shower is the answer.  But sometimes, you get so tired in the evening and you just don't feel like it.  That would be a morning shower day.

Cluttered Garages

I don't understand the people that have so much crap in their garage that they can't park their cars in them.  Do you really have that much stuff?  I thought a garage was made for cars, not clutter.  Get rid of some of that stuff.  Do you really use all of that stuff?  Have you ever heard of a garage sale? 

Monday Night Football

There has got to be a conspiracy brewing in the NFL.  How is it possible that every single MNF game comes down to the final 2 minutes?  I know the NFL is all about parody and equality, but come on.  Maybe ESPN is in on it too.  All I know is that things work out too perfect.  Ratings are at all time high and the big name players are always making plays.  Conspiracy or just good ol' football?  Who knows.

Weekend Time Warp

I think somewhere there is a time warp that speeds up time from Friday afternoon until Sunday night.  One minute you are leaving work on Friday night and the next thing you know you are back at work on Monday morning.  How can this be?  Once Monday does roll around, somebody puts the time warp machine in slow motion. 

Hair Spray vs Hair Gel

The debate rages on.  I used to be a hair spray guy.  I didn't like getting goo on my hands.  But the problem with spray is that it gets on the walls and the mirror.  Then if you don't do it right, you have a sticky forehead all day.  What a pain.  For the last few years, I have switched to gel and will never go back.  No overspray, no sticky mess, just a quick rinse of the hands and you are done.  I will be a gel man for life, or until I go bald.

Alarm Clocks

No wonder most people are unhappy these days.  Every morning you get rudely woken up by the buzzing, beeping, annoyance of your alarm clock.  Can they not come up with a more gentle way of waking people up in the morning.  There you are in peaceful sleep, when all of a sudden, BEEEEP, BEEEEEP, BEEEEEP.  Stop the insanity.

Diets

Diets = Temporary Change in Eating Habits.  That's all diets are, temporary.  The reason diets don't work is because they are temporary.  If they were permanent, then we wouldn't have to keep trying new ones.  And why are there so many different kinds of diets?  Do they really work?  Well, temporarily.

Traffic Gawkers

I don't understand traffic gawkers.  You know what I mean.  There's a wreck or somebody has been pulled over and instead of driving like a normal human, they have to slow down and gawk.  Big deal, its a car.  Come on people, how many times have you seen this?  Pull your head out and get your foot off the brake.  Lets drive.

Pizza on the Weekend

Is there anything better for a lazy American on a weekend than ordering pizza?  It's one of the great American traditions.  Be lazy, eat some grease, and you don't even have to make it.  And it always seems like pizza tastes better on a weekend.  How can you beat that?

3 Day Weekend Chores

Is there a rule that just because it is a 3 day weekend, you have to do some house project?  It always seems that way.  Not that I am complaining.  It is usually something that has been needing to be done for a while, but just never gets done.  I guess that extra day has to be used for something. 

$25 Bill

Why don't we have a $25 bill?  Our coins go 1, 5, 10, 25, 50, 100.  But our dollars go 1, 5, 10, 20, 50, 100.  I just don't get it.  Can't we be consistent with our money.  I want to see the US abolish the $20 bill and go to a $25 bill.  Doesn't this make more sense.  Either that or make the quarter be worth 20 cents, but that just seems ridiculous.  Who's running the US mint anyway.  Can't they get it right?

Internet Speed

How spoiled have we become?  I remember sitting in front of my computer downloading songs with a dial up modem.  You could go eat lunch and come back it would be just about be done and I couldn't wait to hear it.  Now a days, if something doesn't download immediately then we want to throw it out the window.  What is the world coming to?

Waiting Rooms

Why are waiting rooms so boring?  You sit down, you know you are going to have to wait, but it feels like a funeral home in there.  The TV is always on CNN, all there is to read are old magazines, and there is nothing to do.  Why don't they put in a big screen or have a Wii ready.  Just liven up the place.  Give us some color or some excitement.  And get rid of the elevator music.

The Zipper

The age old debate rages on.  When you see someone with their fly down, do you say something or let them walk around like for a while?  For me, it depends on how well you know the person.  If it's somebody I know real well, I may say something.  If it's somebody I don't know, theres no chance I tell them.  It has to be one of the most akward things to do in life.  "Hey buddy, your fly is down."  Do people really say that?

Turn Lanes

Is it illegal to not use your blinker when you are in a turn lane?  Everybody knows you are going to turn anyway.  What's the point?  I might be in the minority on this, but I am a no-blinker-in-the-turn-lane kind of guy.  I think it should be against the law to use a blinker in the turn lane.  People have a hard enough time just watching the light, now you want to throw in one more thing for them to do.  Come on traffic lawmaker guy.  Simplify.